Heather Heather, We Belong Together. Like Sex And Violence. Like Death And Silence.

I think of myself as someone who is awkward in social situations, and only has a few friends, and is inconsiderate of other people's feelings. lately though, i've just been feeling the love of other people towards me, and it feels really great. i probably am not that awkward when talking to people i don't know too well, but i just really hate it, so i feel like because of that i act oddly. i went to a friend's bonfire last night, and i've hung out with the girl probably a total of three times. each time was pretty awesome, i.e. san francisco trip and drive up highway one, but there hasn't been much facetime, so i didn't think she liked me too much. well, two hours into the bonfire a friend of hers showed up and she introduced me to her. i know she had a shot of whisky and two beers in her, but she said that i was an amazing person and that i was really special and that her friend should remember how nice i am. the fact that those feelings lay dormant in her just really made me feel good. same thing with my sister lately. we don't really agree on ideals, and we probably got in our first real fight that lasted around three bitter months. well, when she came back to visit just a week ago, me and her talked everything out and we both got really angry again, but we actually worked everything out, and i feel like i have my sister again. it's awesome. and my best friend elijah bought me twenty bucks worth of xbox live points two days for absolutely no reason! i just love everyone, and i wished everyone could feel like i do, and know the people i know.
father's day was pretty great today. the three children took dad out to carpo's and then went to a shooting range afterwards. my dad said he was really proud of all of us, cause we were all so mature and independent (i realize he was talking to only rachel and josh then, but it still felt good that he directed that at all three of us), and that he's so happy he's our dad. it had been probably a year since i had last shot, but i wasn't as rusty as i thought i would be. it was funny, we bought shooting papers that had big zoombies on them. so, in essence, we were shooting at zombies. haha. my first shot was at seven yards, and i was aiming for his eye, and i hit the white of his eye. it felt really good. after josh and i had shot twelve rounds each at seven yards we did it at fifteen, and i wasn't as bad as i thought i was. the highlight was when we shot one handed at the zombie at fifteen feet. we were aiming for his teeth and i managed to hit his neck and cheek with two of the four shots. the zombie's name is chuck, and he's hanging on my wall now.
i can't wait to hang out with darya on tuesday and go up highway one. the plan is to leave at ten and go until we get to a place where we can buy lunch and find a good beach. we're bringing bathing suits just in case, and i'm bringing coffee in a thurmos for the drive. i wish i was lying on the sun caked sand right now, feeling my blood pooling and warming in my fingers. i don't know why, but i enjoy the ride to places sometimes more than the place itself. i just like sitting down, talking, and watching the world pass me by. hell, i enjoy doing that figuratively.